RELATIONSHIP ADVICE
When to Break Up or Take a Break in a Relationship
You and your partner have been arguing a lot lately. Your schedules barely align, and communication has been tough. The odds are against your favor and make you ponder whether your relationship will survive.
Now that things are getting rocky, what should you do? Should you let go or take a breather?
It’s challenging to decide the course of your relationship. So, here are some points to help you determine when to break up or merely take a break.
Breaking Up vs. Taking a Break
Before anything else, let’s differentiate between breaking up and taking a break.
Breaking up means your relationship is permanently over. You and your partner go your separate ways. You’re no longer in a commitment. You don’t communicate or involve yourselves in each other’s activities. You’ll be free to see other people and start a new relationship.
On the other hand, when you’re on a break, you’re still in a relationship. However, you take some time apart physically and emotionally to give you rest from the struggles you’re facing or time to tend to personal concerns, among other reasons. With this temporary setup, you agree on how long the break will be and how much you’ll communicate.
So, which one will it be?
When to Take a Break
Do you need time and space for yourself? Perhaps taking a break would be better. Here are the signs that point you in this direction:
You still love them but are unsure what to do. Instead of asking how to break up with someone you still love, perhaps you should take a break. You have unwavering feelings for your partner and are willing to work things out. However, you haven’t identified your issues. Consequently, you have no idea how to deal with them. A temporary pause in your relationship gives you time to reflect, identify your pain points, and create solutions to apply after reconnecting.
You’re too stressed. Constant arguments might be taking their toll on you. A time-out is necessary to get some fresh air and rest physically and emotionally.
You want to think things through. You’re dealing with so many issues at once. You have to step back and sort things out at your own pace. You may want to reconcile with your partner. However, you should prioritize yourself.
When to Break Up
Has your relationship become unfixable? It might be time to break up. Here are some signs that tell you this is the right decision:
Your arguments remain unresolved. Though you might have been trying to address your conflict for some time now, nothing seems to work. Perhaps your issues stem from irreconcilable values and goals, which are much deeper than a communication gap.
Your efforts are one-sided. You’re the only one working on your relationship. Meanwhile, your partner is indifferent or uncooperative. In this case, there’s likely no chance your relationship will succeed.
You no longer see a future with them. Your shared dreams and plans no longer seem plausible. Yes, you’re still discovering new things about your partner and relationship, but a future with them seems bleak.
Remember Your Goal
It’s challenging to know when to break up with someone or merely hit pause. However, consider the direction you and your partner want to take together.
After all, the purpose of taking a break is to improve your relationship. If this isn’t your goal, you might as well break up for good.
