RELATIONSHIPS

What Do Women Want in a Man? | 5 Essential Qualities

Miss Matchmaker AFA - Thailand
6 min read3 days ago
A happy couple having a picnic.
It’s the essential qualities of a man that make a woman commit to a long-term relationship with him. | Photo by Matheus Bertelli on Pexels

People have many misconceptions about what women want in a man. Each woman has her own preferences about who she wants to date. However, these preferences are bound to change as she ages and grows.

But women can’t rely on their preferences alone if they want to find the perfect man for them.

The truth is, a woman’s preference is only temporary.

It’s the essential qualities of a man that make a woman commit to a long-term relationship with them.

Men looking for love should know this so they can show exactly what they can bring to the table. If you’re one of these men, try to discover the values and traits that women look for in a man so you can give yourself a headstart.

Preferences vs. Essential Qualities

While the word “preference” is a broad term, it usually refers to a man’s physical or outward qualities, those that initially catch her attention. Some examples are physical traits, his fashion choices, profession, and proximity. These can be negotiable.

But when we speak of long-term relationships, the criteria change. What matter are how compatible you are in terms of core values, belief systems, and chemistry.

In this sense, a woman who prefers dating six-foot, muscular men can end up marrying a scrawny man who matches her core values of being honest, hard-working, and family-oriented.

What Do Women Want in a Man?

1. He’s honest and trustworthy.

A woman always chooses a man who can earn her trust.

If a woman was truly ready for a serious relationship, she would choose a good and honest average guy over a flip-flopping hunk.

Once you show patterns of dishonesty, you won’t establish trust. A relationship without it is like a structure with weak pillars.

Be honest and transparent as early as the getting-to-know stage. Little white lies accumulate in the long run. If you tolerate yourself, lying becomes an unbreakable habit. Worse, you’ll gain the confidence to deceive and betray your partner which can be a big deal-breaker.

2. He’s a good listener.

Oftentimes, women want what they need. And what are the needs of a woman in search of a relationship?

For a starter, she needs a good listener — a man who doesn’t invalidate her thoughts and feelings.

Some studies support that women are more susceptible to anxiety than men. Because the women’s role in relationship dynamics is to be the nurturer and multitasker, they can get caught up in every little issue. They will need to vent and talk.

Men, however, are wired to be problem solvers. They hear a woman venting her frustrations and their first instinct is to look for a solution. But that’s not what women want. Yes, a solution would be nice — somewhere down the line.

But what women want and need is someone to listen to them and make them feel heard and loved.

Besides, a good listener is a real catch since he’s a good communicator too.

A couple having an open communication.
A woman who’s looking for a serious relationship needs a good listener. | Photo by KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA on Pexels

3. He’s supportive.

A supportive man is not overly-possessive. He knows how to set clear boundaries while not compromising his partner’s individuality.

Let’s say your partner currently has a career goal while you feel it’s time to have a baby and start a family. How do you support your partner’s goal without compromising yours?

First, ask her if she agrees to have a child with you in the first place. If yes, then you can both set a timeline about when you can make this possible.

That way, you’re supporting her by giving her the needed time for her to achieve her personal goals.

This example applies to those who are already in a serious relationship. For those in the getting-to-know stage, support your partner with the following tips.

  • Show support by complimenting her achievements
  • Cheer her up when she goes to work
  • If you’re trying to woo a girl, send a cute message like,

‘’Good luck for today!’’

‘’I know you can do it!’’

These simple gestures are small manifestations of emotional support. When a woman seeks your support, it means you’re someone she trusts. May it be emotional, financial, or practical, it’s advisable to lend her a helping hand.

4. He’s not ashamed of being vulnerable.

A man sharing his thoughts and feelings to his partner.
Women seek a deeper level of connection with a man in a serious relationship. | Photo by Ba Tik on Pexels

Do women like emotional men? Traditional gender stereotypes would suggest that emotional men are weak. On the contrary, men who show emotional vulnerability are likely to understand and process their emotions better. Thus, they’re more resilient and sympathetic to others.

A good starting point for any long-lasting relationship is having meaningful conversations. When a man opens up and is not ashamed of being vulnerable, he’s allowing his partner to hear his stories which he doesn’t want others to know. He’s giving that kind of exclusivity, and a wise woman won’t take that for granted.

Ideally, both partners should establish a safe space for each other. It can be in any form and time, for example simply venting out each other’s frustrations during bedtime.

Women seek and want that level of connection with a man in a serious relationship.

5. He’s intimate.

Women seek the kind of intimacy they give out. When women love men, they’re intimate with them in more ways than one. This may be in a physical, practical, or emotional manner.

One desirable trait of a man related to intimacy is being adventurous. If you’re someone who’s open to adventure and excitement, you constantly make an effort to try new things with your partner.

There’s thrill and excitement at the beginning of any relationship, but they don’t last. A naturally intimate man will continue to discover new ways to spice things up.

Going out of your comfort zone or doing new things together will help develop a kind of unbreakable closeness and bond.

A woman looking for a serious partner sees this as a significant value.

The Right Woman Will Help You Become the Man You Want to Be.

Cultivating these values and traits takes time. Use this list as a blueprint for self-development. Make a constant effort to improve yourself, and you will easily attract the type of woman who is into serious dating. The right woman will encourage and support you to become the best version of yourself.

If you’re currently dating someone or are about to, remind yourself that your essential qualities are more important.

Besides them, there are other core values you need to develop like respect, integrity, and maturity to make the relationship healthy and fulfilling.

If you need more dating advice like this, browse our site or join the increasing number of men in our social events. This could be your chance to meet single women who see beyond and are ready for a serious and lifetime relationship.

--

--