Things You Should Never Tell Your Partner

When you get into a fight with your partner, you may say things that you don’t mean. Some awful, damaging words can change the way they feel about you and affect your relationship altogether.

When you get caught up in the moment, take a step back and breathe. When you’re overwhelmed with negative emotions, it can be difficult to focus on the issue at hand.

It’s not that some things are better left unsaid. What you can do is be mindful of what you are about to say.

Is it to make a point? Or is it to make my partner feel bad?

Do I want to prove them wrong? Or do I want to fix this?

Once you practice being mindful of the things you say, it gets easier over time.

The following are some common phrases that couples tend to say to each other when they’re in an argument. Keep this in mind so that you avoid saying them to your partner as well.

“It’s no big deal.”

Maybe you don’t mean any harm. However, dismissing the problem will not only hurt your partner, but yourself as well.

If you have concerns of any kind, it’s best not to avoid dealing with them. Don’t say everything’s okay when it’s not.

Talk to your partner and face whatever issues you have head-on. Sure, the conversation might be uncomfortable, but that’s part of being in a relationship — you put the fire out before it starts to spread.

“Why can’t you be like them?”

Saying something like this will trigger insecurities that they try so hard to overcome.

Comparisons are inevitable. There will be couples that handle conflicts better than you do. But that doesn’t mean you have the right to mindlessly compare your partner to other people.

Your partner might not be the best person sometimes, but the same goes for you. You have to remind yourself of that.

Everyone makes mistakes. You don’t have to rub it in their face to convince them of how wrong they are.

“You’re too sensitive.”

Their feelings might have been too overwhelming for you, and you didn’t know what to do.

Maybe it’s not entirely your fault for calling them out, as some people set a limit to how they react to circumstance. Others, however, may not be as good at it.

As a result, they end up letting their emotions take over.

You can refuse to tolerate your partner for being overly sensitive without invalidating their feelings. You just have to discuss this with them so you can both make the necessary adjustments going forward.

“Your hobbies are so boring.”

Everyone has their way of de-stressing.

While your hobbies may consist of adrenaline-inducing activities, your partner may like tranquility and solitude better.

You might think that this is negative criticism, but it’s nothing but a harsh statement that will make your partner feel unappreciated.

Their preference doesn’t make them dull. Instead of making them feel bad about it, try to get to know their hobbies better. Avoid making rude remarks that will make them lose interest in what they like.

“That’s just who I am.”

To be fair, perhaps certain things about you may be too difficult to unlearn.

It could be a habit you unconsciously picked up as a kid or behaviors you didn’t know were unpleasant until your partner pointed them out.

But don’t make that an excuse for being a terrible partner who refuses to change. Just because you were made aware of it recently doesn’t mean you’re incapable of changing your ways.

Make an effort to be better for yourself and for your partner.

“You made me do this.”

You refuse to hold yourself accountable, so you resort to blaming your partner.

It’s easy to blame other people for your actions when you don’t want to be at fault. This will only lead to an unhealthy relationship with your partner, and it will make them think that they’re the problem.

Own up to your mistakes and focus on finding a solution.

Be Mindful of What You Say and How You Say It

There are instances when you say things to your partner that may come off as passive or offensive. You mean well, but your tone doesn’t match your words.

Regardless of your intentions, your words will be misunderstood if you convey them in a disrespectful manner.

Treat your partner with kindness.

It’s important to choose your words carefully and be mindful of how you say them, as it will also affect your relationships with loved ones.

This guide should give you a good idea what not to say to your partner to avoid hurting their feelings.

With enough practice, you’ll make a habit out of this in no time.