DATING ADVICE
When Is the Right Time to Say I Love You in a Relationship
“I like you.”
Are these words no longer enough to describe your affection for your partner? Even if you add intensifiers, saying “I really, really like you” or “I like you so much,” do the words still fall short of the greatness and depth of your feelings for them?
Perhaps it’s time to use the other L word — love.
But is it genuinely love that you feel? What if they don’t say it back? When is the right time to say I love you anyway?
While “I love you” consists of just three words, they hold so much weight. Understandably, you want to make sure you mean it.
For some, saying it three months into the relationship is too soon, while for others, it’s the perfect moment.
But compared to the length of time you’ve been together, the quality of your relationship and the earnestness of your feelings matter more.
Here are some signs to help you see whether you’re ready to utter those heart-stopping words.
1. You know them well
When is the right time to say I love you?
Definitely not when you’ve just started going out. Those words mean nothing if you don’t know your partner that well yet.
You must first accept them for who they are, flaws and all, not just one aspect of them.
Only when you know your partner’s background, positive and negative sides, and current circumstances can you appreciate them more holistically; hence, it’s when you can genuinely say you love them.
2. You’re willing to help them grow
You may have accepted your partner, including their flaws. But can you genuinely say you love them when you’re unwilling to help them become better?
Embracing your partner’s flaws does not mean tolerating their bad behavior. On the contrary, you should be patient with them and push them towards growth.
This shows that you sincerely love them and are ready to tell them that in words.
3. You have plenty of reasons why
Shared memories act as one of the foundations of your relationship. These may include celebrating your partner’s promotion at work, caring for each other when sick, and supporting each other in accomplishing your dreams.
These experiences bring you and your partner closer as you discover more of each other’s emotions and thoughts.
Once you’ve had your fair share of ups and downs, you can say you love them. It makes the three words more meaningful instead of saying them when you can’t even pinpoint moments that can tell your partner why.
4. You’re committed
Are you willing to be with your partner for the long term?
If you’re willing to put in the effort day in and day out to build your relationship and resolve conflicts that come your way, you can tell your partner you love them to affirm your commitment.
Compared to simply liking them, you’re ready to invest everything in the relationship.
When is the right time to say I love you?
Your answer to this question shouldn’t only depend on how long you’ve been together. Instead, also consider the context of your relationship and your readiness.
Once you’ve confirmed the authenticity of your feelings, let the words naturally come out of your lips.
