DATING ADVICE
On Relationships: Do Men Always Have to Listen to Their Girlfriends?
It’s fairly common to come across cheeky dating advice that urges men to maintain good relationships by always listening to their women.
After all, isn’t it the age of feminism? Wouldn’t it be easier to avoid fights and just assume their girlfriends are always right?
But what a lot of people fail to understand is that it’s one thing to hear your partner out or consider their point of view, and it’s entirely another to give up your right to have an opinion at all.
And it’s high time we figure out exactly which one is better in building healthy and committed relationships.
Where Is This Coming From?
While the essence of progressive movements like feminism and gender equality is for the good of all, some people have managed to twist these ideologies in support of problematic views instead.
For modern dating and relationships, men sometimes get unfairly treated when they’re forced to show their support for women’s rights by relinquishing their own.
Instead of a balanced partnership where both sides are taken into consideration, some outspoken people push that men give way and let their girlfriends win every argument or dictate the best course of action. We need to abolish the patriarchy, right?
But this is a false dichotomy.
Just because the goal is to elevate the voices of women, it doesn’t mean men need to be silenced. In order to achieve true equality, both sides must be given the opportunity to talk and listen.
What Should Be Done?
So, do men have to listen to their girlfriends?
Yes, of course.
But their girlfriends must also do the same, and in every discussion or disagreement within relationships, neither partner should be declared an automatic winner by virtue of their gender.
There’s no monopoly when it comes to speaking your mind, after all. Fostering healthy communication — one of the most important aspects of a loving partnership — is all about giving and taking.
Sure, it can be funny to tease men about “the best ways to avoid a nagging girlfriend” or to egg on an angry woman who’s ripping her partner a new one over another dispute, but these harmless jokes can create a culture where feminism isn’t being practiced — it’s still inequality, just given a different flavor.
How Will This Help Me and My Relationship?
If you’re a woman, understanding the scope and limitations of your right to have an opinion in this day and age is crucial.
Relationships need reciprocity. Remember that denying your boyfriend any chance to defend himself or offer a suggestion or even just make a comment can lead to him giving up altogether.
So before you do something you’ll regret later on just to make yourself feel good or feel superior for all of five seconds, ask yourself this: is a spineless, submissive man who has no will of his own really what you want in a partner?
If you’re a man, on the other hand, then you deserve a moment to bask in the relief that no, you don’t, in fact, have to keep your mouth shut for the rest of your life — or however long your relationships tend to last.
But you also gotta know that being a loving and devoted boyfriend is not a tall order. You certainly shouldn’t need anybody else to convince you that listening to your woman is a no-brainer.
If you truly love her, it will come naturally. And if she loves you just as much, then you’ll have no problem figuring out when to listen, when to speak up, and when words are not needed at all.
