RELATIONSHIPS

Why a Rebound Relationship Is Never a Good Idea

Miss Matchmaker AFA - Thailand
3 min readJan 19, 2024
A couple in a rebound relationship
If you’re going through a breakup, a rebound relationship should be the last thing on your mind. | Photo by César O’neill on Pexels

Where do broken hearts go?

Some go to the bar to drown their misery in alcohol; others travel to find their lost selves; and still others get a makeover to make themselves feel better.

There are a slew of possible coping mechanisms to get over a breakup. But for some, if they lose one, they simply go and get a new one.

If you can’t endure being single or want a quick remedy for the pain, you might be one of those who’ll immediately jump into a new relationship.

There’s nothing wrong with having a new partner since you’re officially single. But if you get yourself tied up in the speed of light, you’ve initiated a rebound relationship. And it’s hardly a good idea when it comes to moving on.

You might not see its pitfalls at first glance, but truth be told, you’re only preparing yourself for more pain.

Here’s why.

1. It’s a Band-Aid Solution

Pain is the worst thing about a breakup.

Losing someone dear to you pierces your heart. It brings out your insecurities, sadness, and regrets. As a result, you’re willing to do anything to take it all away.

And what more efficient way to do so than finding a new love, right? You’ll instantly feel better having a substitute. However, its effects are only superficial.

Getting over someone doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time to heal a broken heart before it can learn to love again. In a rebound relationship, you’re just putting on a band-aid, which isn’t enough to cure the pain.

2. Comparisons with Your Ex

It hasn’t been long since you were in your ex’s arms. Because of this, you’ll tend to see your new partner through the lens of your previous relationship.

You’ll tend to compare their appearance, characters, and skills. You might also project your regrets and negative feelings toward them, causing arguments.

Your relationship issues don’t necessarily have anything to do with your current partner, but they get entangled because you haven’t moved on.

3. You’re Not Really In Love

Ask yourself, Why are you into a new relationship so quickly?

Is it because you’re in love? Are you lonely? Do you like that person for who they are? Or are you with them because they distract you from your ex?

When you’re still caught up in your wounds and lingering feelings, chances are, it’s not love that motivates you. In other words, you’re not in a loving relationship but in a useful one.

4. It Won’t Last

A relationship with a shaky foundation will not last for long.

If you’re in it for the wrong reasons, such as to escape the pain or forget your ex, it will only last as long as it addresses those needs.

When your sadness fades away, or you meet another person to fill that role, you’ll find no reason to keep the relationship.

Don’t Use Another Person

A broken heart is hard to mend. Do whatever helps you cope with the pain and find healing. However, never use another person.

Instead of looking for a rebound relationship, work on yourself to put the pieces of your heart back together. Only then will you be ready to open yourself to new love.

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