DATING ADVICE
Questions for Long Distance Relationships + How to Ask Them
“Hi. How was your day?”
“Fine. Same old. How are you?”
“I’m great. Thanks.”
“Cool.”
Seen. The end.
Are your conversations becoming as stale as this? I hope not.
It’s no secret that communication isn’t easy to navigate in a long distance relationship. Perhaps your exchanges have become so repetitive that you struggle to find a deeper connection. Maybe you don’t know what topics can make your interactions fun and meaningful.
Whatever situation you find yourself in, you should strive to improve communication with your partner.
Here are three kinds of questions for long distance relationships that can help you have more engaging conversations with your partner.
1. The How’s and Why’s
Our exchanges often become dull because we focus on what to ask. If only we listened more, we could easily pick up on possible topics from their responses.
Branch out the conversation by delving into the bigger picture your partner hints at. Ask questions that start with “how” or “why.”
- “Why did you move to another city?”
- “How did you end up adopting your cat?”
- “Why did you decide to quit ballet in high school?”
2. Comment + Question Combo
Let your partner know you’re interested in what they’re sharing by commenting before asking another question or changing the topic.
It shows them that you’ve heard what they said and appreciate them for sharing it.
- “My aunt lives in the same city as you. How long have you been there?”
- “Your brother is hilarious! I would have found it difficult to hide my giggles. So, what happened next?”
3. Deep Questions
Don’t be afraid to delve into more personal subjects. Ask deeper questions to become closer and more comfortable with each other.
However, ask in a respectful and non-intrusive manner. If your partner looks uncomfortable, don’t press them for an answer.
Also, receive their stories with reverence. It’s challenging to bare yourself, even to someone you like.
- “It sounds like you grew up in a strict household. What was your childhood like?”
- “You seem tired. Is something stressing you lately?”
- “I’m sorry you felt that way. Would you like to share more about it?”
Your response?
When it’s your turn to answer their questions, respond with enthusiasm. Make them feel that you’re invested in your conversation and that you want them to know more about you. Add details and be sincere.
Notice the difference between the following:
#1: “My weekend was great. I went hiking.”
#2: “I had an incredible weekend! It was great hiking with some friends after months of focusing on my project at work. I enjoyed the fresh air and greenery. I wish we could go hiking sometime, too.”
The animated (second) one is better because it shows your openness to sharing about your life. In turn, your partner will be more open to sharing theirs.
The more sincere you are, the more your conversations will naturally flow.
However, when spontaneity fails, referring to this list of questions for long distance relationships should do the trick.
