DATING TIPS
Meeting Someone New? Try These Tips for Engaging Conversations
Brown Oxfords or sneakers?
An arcade game or a walk in the park?
Pick up your date at their home or meet them at your rendezvous?
At point blank, these are low-stake, no-brainer questions. However, when meeting someone new, your choice becomes a factor in your success in securing a second date, making you anxious and stuck in the middle.
But more than what to wear or do, thinking about what to say is more stressful.
Starting a conversation and keeping it engaging can seem like a tall order that makes your hands sweat and your knees tremble, especially if you consider yourself an introvert.
Small talk might help at the outset, but it’s not enough to last the whole date. Also, it’s challenging to move from a shallow conversation to a deeper and more engaging one.
That said, here are some useful conversation tips when you meet someone new.
1. Give your date a compliment
Is your date also nervous? Compliment them.
It might sound cliché, but it can be a game-changer when said genuinely. After all, nothing puts one in a good mood better than hearing something positive about themselves.
Point out something specific about your date, such as their cheerful smile or how they thoughtfully offered you a glass of water. Complimenting how they look also doesn’t go out of style, especially when said sincerely.
2. Don’t be afraid to be personal
What makes small talk unpleasant is that it’s often superficial. But as much as you want to delve into deeper conversation topics when meeting someone new, you fear being intrusive.
But the truth is that it just takes a courageous remark to break the ice and slowly build a connection. Try asking these personal questions to start a conversation:
What brings you here?
What’s something I wouldn’t guess about you?
What’s on your bucket list?
Do you live alone, with your parents, or with your friends?
3. Share your thoughts and stories
You don’t have to ask questions all the time. You can also offer candid insights to create a jumping point to deepen the conversation or branch out to other topics.
For instance, if your date said they recently attended a concert by their favorite artist, say things like,
“I saw clips of it online, and honestly, I don’t think it’s my cup of tea,” or
“I went with a friend and saw them perform at a festival, and I didn’t think I’d enjoyed their performance as much as I imagined I would.”
Being truthful about who you are and what you’re thinking makes conversations truly interesting.
You can also start a conversation about the things happening around you. If a dog passes by, you can say, “How cute! You know, I love dogs.”
Or, you can comment on a song playing, saying, “This reminds me of high school. Do you remember this song?”
4. Allow pauses
You might think that silence is a bad sign, so you should do everything to avoid dead air in your conversations.
However, pauses are natural. A few seconds will help you collect your thoughts and find the right questions. It also allows you to digest what your date is saying, preventing confusion and misunderstandings.
Moreover, those moments of meaningful silence give you a good sense of how you feel about each other.
When You Meet Someone New, You Now Know What to Do
Getting tongue-tied and nervous can happen when meeting someone new. You’ll also have your fair share of awkward moments.
However, these tips can help you create enjoyable and meaningful conversations, allowing you to make the most of your time together.
