LIFE, CULTURE, & MARRIAGE
Dear Future Husbands of Asian Wives
I hope you know just how lucky you are — how lucky you will be.
Not because Asian wives are necessarily better than others, or that a wife from the Orient is a rare “prize” that only “worthy” men achieve, but because a wife is a precious thing.
She’ll be your partner in love and in life. She’ll be your confidant and companion. Your soulmate and best friend.
That is why you’re lucky.
The concept of family is a vital part of many Asian cultures, and a lot of Asian women grow up valuing familial relations above all.
“Obey your elders.” “Make your mother and father proud.” “Be honorable and dutiful.”
It’s a tradition almost as old as time.
I hope you understand that though your wife may or may not subscribe to this belief, she will still love you and cherish your partnership. She will protect the family you’ll be raising with her.
And unlike traditions handed down from generation to generation, she will have chosen your life together willingly. She will have chosen you.
Women come in different shapes and sizes, something I trust that you know as someone who will choose to spend the rest of his life with one. Your wife will have her own beliefs and convictions. She will have her own choices.
I hope you get to learn and respect her with as much care and dedication as you’ll have pledged in your wedding vows. I hope you support her wholeheartedly.
Though Asian wives shouldn’t be stereotypes, Asian women still share many struggles and challenges. The world is not always kind to women, after all. Women who enter intercultural marriages often face this challenge more.
This is another thing that you need to prepare yourself for: an imperfect world with imperfect people who may not always have your wife’s best interests at heart. Who will discriminate against her and call her names. Who may wish to cause her harm.
She is strong and can certainly take care of herself, but know that there will be times when she’ll need your strength and care to make it through the day. She will need your unconditional love.
Your wife may know how to cook. Or she may not. Modern Asian wives have more freedom now to pursue skills and trades beyond the home and the kitchen.
Fret not. She will always come home to you — hopefully with food for two.
Your wife may be gentle and delicate. Or she may be fierce and assertive. Her people and the women of her native land have always been gracious mothers as well as powerful warriors.
She can choose to be either. She can be both.
I urge you to remember that though your wife is a product of her heritage and culture, she will not be a mirror of all Asian women or Asian wives. She will be but one example.
Love her for far more than what she looks like or where she came from. Love her for who she is. Love her for who she will be.
She will be the last girl you bring home to your folks and the mother of your children. She will be your worst critic and your biggest supporter. She will be your better half.
She is your wife.
